A New Definition

Well well, Rachel. Here you are, not writing, but boy are you living. Life is still pretty much the same; working the good old job, being a part of some insanely good theatre, making friends. The only thing that's changed is I am officially happier than all get out. (I agree, interesting choice of words, but it's the first thing that came to mind so I'm going with it.) So, who's causing this insane happiness? This luminescent quality of life? This incessant fall into love?

He is.

Waking Up

"Nothing is more practical than finding God, that is, than falling 

in love in a quite absolute, final way. What you are in love with, 

what seizes your imagination will affect everything. It will decide 

what will get you out of bed in the mornings, what you will do with 

your evenings, how you spend your weekends, what you read, who 

you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and 

gratitude. Fall in love, stay in love, and it will decide everything."

Pedro Arrupe, S.J.

When you do, you will know. When love stirs ever fiber of your being, everything is different. You feel different, refreshed, as if you had drunk some rainwater. Life itself makes you giddy, laughing comes more easily, and you'll wonder why you are smiling so much. It's like being tireless, excited, invigorated, and breathless all at once. So, fall in love with someone, with your life, and stay there. It's just the beginning.

Rae..

The "Real" World

Well, I've done it. Entered the league of the "real worlders." I have a "real" job, a place to live, a car, and real independence. Annnnd...that's about it. It hasn't been jarring, or scary, or intimidating. But it has been a little lonely. I'm looking forward to meeting some new people so I don't have to have fun by myself :) I certainly have not been bored, but just wish I had someone else to adventure with. The best thing about my job is that I have weekends off. Which means I can visit friends anytime, or they can visit me! And that's been a most wonderful thing. I'm really enjoying Omaha. I've seen some great theatre, visited museum exhibits, and enjoyed living with soul. I promise myself that, no matter what, I will live my life with love coursing through my veins.

In the words of Chris Brown, "don't you be holdin' back your love, don't you be holdin' back."

xo...Rae

Rawsome

The title of this post may sound cheesy, but believe me, THIS (pictured above) is not. We'll call this...liquid gold. And maybe we should add 'elixir' to it. Too much, you think? Well, I disagree. Because after I drink one of these I feel like I just eclipsed the sun. Oranges, strawberries, dates, coconut water, pineapple, and pears. Did I mention it tastes like a fluffy cloud? Probably the avocado I threw in for extra richness and nutrients. BONUS! It gives it a mousse-like texture :) I've been a vegan for a few years, but there's just nothing like eating raw. I'm trying to slowly move back to eating this way. S-l-o-w-l-y. Because detox is not joyful or enjoyable. But if you can master eating raw vegan? Yes, life is good when you feel good. 

Cheers to that!

Rae

Fljótavík

There are few things as beautiful as Sigur Rós. Today, this is all you need. Trust me. 

Rae

Deserving It

Sometimes I find myself saying, "Rachel, you deserve this." Well, maybe a little more than sometimes. Hehe. But seriously, you HAVE to do this at least sometimes. If you didn't, then who would? Now don't get me wrong. I am treated well beyond what I deserve and my life right now is akin to an amusement park: full of fun, thrills, fright, and lots of smiles. I am surrounded by people who love me and life couldn't be be better. 


But sometimes I like to take a little credit for myself. You should try it. It feels gooood. Like this morning, when I  learned all the auto insurance options and selected a plan for me, myself, and I. And my new car. That I bought. And then I went and got it registered and licensed. By myself. Maybe it sounds a little childish, but I really do feel proud of myself! That combined with interviewing for jobs makes me feel grown-up. But I am happy to announce that I am still fun, young, carefree. I sure hope that never changes :) So, here's hoping that this pattern of things falling into place will soon include getting a job. To pay for everything I just "accomplished." Hahaha. Oh, the irony. 


To conclude, my fruit smoothie tasted extra fine this morning. Raspberries, strawberries, bananas, dates, and coconut water. If you want to experience the sensation of drinking liquid raspberry sherbet, I suggest you 'hop to it' and whip one of these up. Don't forget to add that splash of happy high you're experiencing right now. You know, the one you get when you're taking over the world. You know you got it. And yes, you deserve it. 


Happy Valentine's Day to me. Again :) 


Cheers!  Rae

So...what now?

Does it seem like we're always waiting on the next thing? Anyone? Better job (or just A job, in my case) better car, next big thing, etc.

You know what? I don't really want to live like that anymore. Because all these "nexts" are not the only thing we have to look forward to. We could try being ok with where we are right now. This actually takes a lot more effort than you think. I, for one, am always looking forward to the next thing. Sometimes seems like I'm never satisfied. How selfish. It's so. Selfish. So, if I'm impatient and I want a situation to be different than it is, I need to try and savor the level it's at now. You know why? Because there will always come a day when you will look back on what was once a "next" thing. And by then, it's over. What we love, we should love now. Love it how it is, wherever you are.

To be happy now..

Rae

Rumination

Falling. A state in which we all find ourselves at times. We must be fascinated with this sensation. After all, it can be exhilarating. But also, something we never want to do.

Falling is as wonderful as the realization of something I have to tell you. What we love we should love now. We rarely age well at all. Too many seconds spent gazing at the wall. Not enough glances to the other side of the bed. But if our strategies don't change, we'll gaze longer and longer at the northern lights. If we open our eyes, once, the world will never let us forget. There is no way to blot out the sun, not with our anger or desires for hatred. Warmth steals across my face because dawn is whispering secrets in my ear. You steal a glance because your face is cold and I can't help but smile. Have we really been alive all this time? No, never. But it begins today. Dawn has left us but the day is rising. Jump, and scream for joy, falling.

I once saw a brilliant production of The Wake by Lisa Kron in Los Angeles. My favorite lines sums up this mysterious sensation. "Until you hit the ground, falling is a lot like flying." Here's to not hitting the ground.

Rae

Inní mér syngur vitleysingur

Sometimes, my own brilliant (lol) words won't even do me justice. Nothing I could say could possibly help the shaping of this helpless joy. Sometimes I just have to sing words that have already been written. And if I knew Icelandic, I would sing these.

On a silver river
You illuminate the whole world and blue eyes
Cut the starry sky
I make a wish and close my eyes
Yes please, now a tale comes true

At the speed of stars

Inside a heart explodes, wreckage of a plane

Down in the earth sings

I make a wish and now close my eyes

Yes, do that, a little dance

All is forgotten in very little time and yet begins

Opening eyes

My best friend, regardless of what happens

I swallow a tear and breath hair

Unruly, in embrace cry

When we meet

When we kiss

The lips burnt, let us hold hands

I see you wake

I see you naked

Inside me a madman sings

Always you wade, we run faster

Everything becomes smaller

I shout louder

Am about to wade, going away

My best friend, regardless of what happens

I swallow a tear and breath hair

Unruly, in embrace cry

When we meet

When we kiss

The lips burnt, let us hold hands

I see you wake

I see you naked

Inside me a madman sings

Wonder at that, won't you?

..Rae

A Sales Pitch of Sorts

If you haven't given God a try yet, you really should. He's so wonderful it's hard to believe. I think that's one of the barriers between us and God. I like to think He's really pretty simple. He loves us. And He wants us to love him back. That's it! There's also all this other great stuff like giving His life for us and helping us whenever we ask. My mother, a very wonderful woman who lives her life by grace, told me last night that God is just waiting for us to trust Him. As soon as we trust Him with our lives, great things will begin to happen. Why? Because God will never let us down. Never. Pretty amazing when you stop to think about it.

Lately I've been struggling with my faith, but I can't help always coming back to this. God is just so great. Why wouldn't we want Him in our lives? Sometimes things are just bad. And I'll take all the help I can get.

Sometimes I just pray that God will be merciful. I wish I had the heart to love like Him. There is so much of life that is a blind prayer. Grasping in the dark has often been my way. There's no deal you can make to save your soul. Only a prayer that life will be merciful. And that our Lord will show us our worth before we are ruined from searching.

Like a sun kiss

You mend my tattered being

My soul you drench in water

My heart you soak in wine

You speak to me in words of love

That only can be Thine.

So, my dear friends. Take a shot at God and then realize you are happy.

Rae

First Things First

One of my favorite things to do is to have adventures. Now, this may sound generic, but wait till you hear what kind of adventures! To me, many things have adventurous potential. And while climbing Mount Everest, swimming the English Channel, and African safaris are popularly thought of as "adventures," they are a little insurmountable for me. I'd rather not spend years preparing for my "adventure." How dull! I say, let's get on with it! Even if I ever reached the top of Mount Everest, I would probably fall off. I do enjoy swimming, but let's be realistic. I like a nice lap pool or perhaps a pleasant lake. I dearly love the idea of a safari, but I have a few unmanageable fears that would render safari travel quite difficult. So, dear reader, what shall we venture to do? I'm pretty simple. I love trips. Where? You name it. Let's go run an errand! Or wander into the woods and shoot some glass bottles. What matters most is whom I'm with. Boring or exciting, if you are willing to brave them with me, I'm game. Might as well make our often mundane lives as exciting as possible. Even if it is a little ridiculous. But I love ridiculous.

My most coveted destination is Iceland. If you go to Iceland's website, the first thing you'll encounter is a fabulous description that reads; "Iceland is not just a destination. It is an adventure."

I'll see you there.

Rae

Hey Rachel, why don't you write something?

Well blogger, here I am. I have debated you for a long time now and I finally caved. New year and all. Making all sorts of exciting plans for myself. Writing regularly just had to be one of them. I've heard it's good for you, your soul, your "ness" I guess. Right now I just have a folder entitled "Hey Rachel, why don't you write something." This is a little more refined and official. Anyhoo, you might be wondering about the title of my blog. Iridescent. It might just sound like "shiny" but it actually has a bit of a deeper definition than that.

Thank God.

"Displaying a spectrum of colors that shimmer and change due to interference and scattering as the observer's position changes" There you have it. The word may not seem like much, but if you tilt your head and check out the light a bit more, you may just find something in the interference worth peering at. So, in this blog I'll be 'observing' and 'remarking' as my position changes in life. I might also throw in some extra tidbits, like...music, food, wine, theatre and other fun flavors. See you round!


Rae